Just Back From Guatemala

The ritual starts as we approach the bus terminal/bus stop. We stand out as the gringos that we are, and bus boys attack us from all directions, shouting the destination of their particular bus - "Xela, Xela", "Hue-hue, Hue-Hue", "Arequipa, Arequipa", "Terenure, Terenure" (OK I made that one up, but it is something Dublin bus should think about!). Once we have told them where we are going, then someone will show us where our bus is parked, or throw us on if the bus happens to be on its way. The next step is to help us stow our luggage. So far it has travelled on top of the bus, under the bus, behind the backseat, in our seat, on our laps, in the aisle and even under the gear stick at the front of the bus. Once our luggage is safely tucked away, then we get on the bus, with a general "buenes dias!" to those already onboard - it is the thing to do! Something else I may try to get going on Dublin and Sydney buses! Finding a seat and knowing the best place to sit is part of the fun.

Too far up the back and you are in for a bumpy ride, too far up the front and you risk being swamped by locals, who seem to crowd into the front 3 rows, whether there is space or not. Seats that you think are for 2 people only, have been seen to hold 6 people, including a couple of kids. Once we are settled then the salespeople get on to ply their wares. Anything and everything you could need for a pleasant journey has been made available to us. Newspapers, ice creams, drinks, herbal viagra, underwear, meat & potatoe dinners, sweets, jewellery. The sales pitches themselves can be inspiring, one guy went on for 10 mins to sell us a 4 lollies for $1. He sold a few!!! The one selling the herbal viagra had anatomically correct diagrams. Mmmmmmm. Lucky that wasn't any early morning bus.

Eventually the bus will get on its way. Stopping 10m from the terminal to pick up stragglers and those locals too lazy to walk the last 10m to the terminal, though sometimes they are avoiding a departure tax. The bus boy is now hanging out of the front door, yelling the destination to anyone standing by the side of the road, or running along beside the bus helping (throwing) people up onto the bus. Once we have gone a bit of a distance, stopping regularly to collect more people, their goods from the market, their chickens and what not, the bus boy will come through and collect the money. How he remembers who has paid and who hasn't is still a mystery to us.

The bus boy is a very important part of the bus ritual. He can be in age from about 15-50. We had one who looked like Elvis recently, complete with sideburns and shirt un-buttoned down his chest. Nice! Anyway, the bus boy has to shout the destination, collect the money, put people in seats, make other passengers squish up when seats are getting scarce, climb up onto the roof of the bus to collect luggage, climb down from the roof and into the bus, while the bus is moving, after getting the luggage, help the driver overtake trucks on dangerous corners by signally said trucks to let the bus in, flirt with any pretty girls who get on and remember where the gringos want to go, then signal them at their stop! All in a days work. They are the heart and soul of latin America!

Once we are at our destination, we are usually shouted at by another lot of bus boys but at this stage, it is time for the hotel and hostel owners to take over, shoving fliers of their accommodation in our faces, trying to get us to go with them. After 13 hours of travel, which is what we had last week, it is a welcome thing, someone offering a free taxi and 24 hour hot water. Ahhhhhhhhh. And so ends the ritual of the chicken bus, until the next time, when it all starts again.

Anyway, back to Guatemala. What a great country. It was the country where we went to loads of markets, which could have had something to do with me liking it so much.

We had a week in a town called Quetzaltenango, or Xela where we rented an apartment. Spent the week doing day trips to markets and little villages. One day was to some hot springs in the middle of the forest. Beautiful. Another to the San Francisco El Alto market. The main attraction here was the animal market that happens in a dust bowl car park above town. We knew it was going to be something special when we saw two sheep going home attached to the top of a bus! We stood in the market just watching the action as people bought and sold chickens, ducks, turkeys, pigs, cattle, sheep, dogs, cats, rabbits and birds. The best part was when prospective buyers "inspected" the animals. Teeth and tongues checked, feathers lifted and examined. Much to the disgust of the squealing, squawking animals. But a treat for us!

From Xela we headed to lake Atitlan - "the most beautiful in the world"! It is surrounded by 3 volcanoes and has the most amazing blue coloured water. We strolled around to a couple of villages, went by ferry to the other side and stayed one night there. Also visited a town that has the most bizarre patron saint, if you could call it that. Maximon is a kind of doll, about 4 foot tall, covered in silk scarves and ties. Locals come and pray to him for all sorts of things. Part of the praying ritual is to offer alcohol, cigarettes and cash. Two "minders" sit next to him, pouring the alcohol down his throat and ashing the cigarettes. A sight to behold.